May 11, 2012

I'm Worried About The Next Generation

 The news is enough to scare the daylights out of me.

We’ve got a couple down in Texas tying their four children to the hood of their car and driving down the road. I guess they didn’t have enough room for the kids to ride inside or maybe they were misbehaving.

Some of us have joked, telling our kids if they didn’t be quiet we were going to tie them on top or make them walk. This couple looked high so maybe their doped up brains didn’t realize you don’t really do crap like that.

Then we’ve got a woman in another state, I didn’t catch the location but it doesn’t really matter people are nuts all over, who was wrestling with a police officer while pregnant with her sixteenth child.

Sixteenth? Why in God’s name would you have that many kids?

Anyway, they tased her, not sure if they didn’t realize she was pregnant or not, but now she’s complaining about them endangering her unborn child. I guess she thinks wrestling with cops isn’t harmful to babies. What I want to know is who was taking care of the fifteen kids still at home?

Then there’s a story about the growing obesity problem in America (could be why the police didn’t know that woman was pregnant) and how it’s costing our country billions of dollars.

It’s not safe to send our kids to school because of the teachers trying to have sex with them (I’m talking about female teachers).

We had a case recently of a woman teacher who was taking indecent pictures of little girls at an elementary school and sending them to some pervert in another state.

What does she possibly get from a sick relationship like that? He’s obviously not interested in her and after seeing her picture I can see why but what does she get out of this; his attention, even though he’s only using her for child pornography?

Women used to have more sense. If they couldn’t get a man they took up knitting or quilting, they didn’t find the first pervert that gave her half a minute’s worth of attention and ruin her life. Now that teacher has lost her job, her credentials and she’s going to spend a lot of years in jail.

We’ve got babies wandering the streets unattended in nothing but a diaper and parents with the morals of an alley cat.

Maybe we need to bring Home Economics back to the schools. Someone needs to teach kids how to take proper care of babies, their parents aren't doing it.

You don’t strap children to hoods of automobiles, babies can’t take care of themselves and you don’t let your ten year old drive you home when you are drunk.

Here’s a website full of bad parent pictures. It seems to be “in style” to be lazy, lousy parents and proud of it.

 Oh, America isn't the only screwed up country. In India they have baby tossing day where a holy man throws infants from a roof to people waiting down below. If these kids grow up afraid of heights we'll know why. 

May 9, 2012

Basil Had His Wart Removed

About a year ago my Boston terrier Basil developed a wart on his forehead right between his eyes. I took him to the vet because at first I didn’t know what it was and thought it could be a tumor. Dog’s get cancer and growths just like people.

The vet said it was just a wart and nothing to worry about so we left it alone. Problem was, it kept growing and he would bump it and make it bleed, not a lot but just enough to make it look sore.

So I decided to have the vet take it off so it wouldn’t bother him anymore. My oldest son will be pleased because he says, “it’s ugly.” It isn’t pretty but it didn’t bother me near as much as it bothered my son.

They had to put Basil under anesthetic to remove the wart and since he’s so old I didn’t want to put him in any danger but it became a problem so yesterday morning Mr. Warty Head went in for minor surgery.

We’ll have to stop calling him Warty Head or Warty Headed Dog now but since he can’t hear he won’t know the difference if we forget and use those old pet names.

We’ve made jokes about him trying to turn into a unicorn since it’s right in the middle of his forehead and getting bigger. You can make jokes about dogs and they don’t care, they love you anyway.

He will be thirteen May 30, which is coming up pretty soon. Humans have work done when they get older so I guess he’s no different. He never looks in the mirror and doesn’t really care how he looks; smell is all he cares about. Actually, he can stink quite a bit and not mind that either.

We have a big backyard so taking him for walks was never an issue but he’s less active and has been putting on some weight. Neutering him last year probably didn’t help that matter any. He no longer marks his territory (why bother?) and all he has to live for is food. He has arthritis and it probably hurts to lift his leg.

He takes glucosamine chondroitin every morning for joint pain, which helps but you reach an age where you have ailments and there isn’t a whole lot you can do about it. The reason for this last bit of ramble is to tell you I’ve started taking him for walks at the park.

The first time we went he wasn’t thrilled especially since I didn’t let him go where he wanted so he walked a few yards, turned around and went back to stand by the car. “I’m ready to go home.”

I took him back the second day and he did better. I let him go where he wanted which at first confused him. He's used to me tugging on the leash telling him where to go. We walked about ¾ of a mile and then I could tell he was wearing out and took him back to the car.

When he was younger he could jump right into the car which isn’t really a car, it’s an SUV, not a large SUV at least not by Oklahoma standards but still a bit high off the ground for an old Boston Terrier to jump into.

Here he is with his wart.


Here he is without his wart. He has stitches but you may not be able to tell with my sorry picture taking. I couldn't get a good one without the possessed eyes either but hopefully you get the idea. 

He won't win any beauty contests but I love him anyway. 

May 2, 2012

Who Makes The Most Money Writing Online?

There was a time, many moons a go, when most writers were gray haired men in ratty tweed jackets pecking away on a typewriter. Sorry girls but most women were at home being wives and mothers, nothing wrong with stay at home moms but that was how it was.

Now days, it seems that everyone is writing: teenagers, grandmas and office workers bored with their duties. Everyone has something to say and want people to read it.

There is so much competition that many have resorted to methods a bit unconventional and even unethical to get their work noticed.

So who gets the most notice these days? Women with sexy avatars. That’s right, doesn’t matter if they are good writers or know what they are even talking about, they get the most attention.

I have read some really bad stuff that is misspelled, grammar errors abound and no common sense to the article but they have a huge audience.

In the old days most people that read were intellectuals with money to buy books. The poor didn’t have enough funds and many couldn’t even read. Move forward several decades and now most people in America are literate, at least at a third grade level and books, newspapers and the Internet are all free with the help of our local libraries.

The majority of people aren’t interested in intelligent conversation and they don’t even care if the facts are accurate. I’m going to give you American statistics because that’s where I live. These will vary in other countries.

Most Internet users, about 70% depending on whose findings you read, are male and around the age of 36 give or take.

Some of the statistics I’ve read say most have had some college and are upper income but I think that is inaccurate. From the people I talk to, I think less people have gone to college and most fall into the lower income bracket, here’s why. All you have to have these days is a smart phone to access the Internet. Some of these websites are assuming people have a computer and pay for service, I don’t think that is true but I digress.

Back to my point, young men are easily influenced by pretty women, especially if they give them half a minutes worth of attention, some women have figured this out using it to their advantage.

Are you ready for this? The people making the most money from online blogging and article writing are (or at least want you to think they are) young attractive women. Some market savvy women use it to their advantage.

I know women who have an avatar of a girl in a bikini or sexy clothing, their writing is atrocious and yet they get many comments, views and their income is much higher then many of their peers simply due to their picture and a bit of flirting in the comments. It works, they know it and they are cashing in at the bank.

Here’s the kicker, most of those avatars are not the writer’s own picture. They borrow them from stock photos or some other source knowing they’ll get more readers then if they use their own image because many of them are middle age women who look nothing like the pin ups they are portraying.

I even know a couple men (Don’t worry guys, I won’t blow your cover) who use a female pseudonym and avatar so they can make it in the writing world.

Sure there are still intelligent people out there that want to read articles written by people who know what they are talking about and can give them good information but for the mediocre journalist it’s not so easy to get noticed.

So, should we all use cleavage shots as our profile pictures and flirt to get attention? Of course not. I know a couple young women writers who didn’t even use revealing photos but were stalked and traumatized by strange men who became enamored with them. We can’t be too careful these days.

Write well written, informative articles and you’ll get an audience, it might not be huge and you probably won’t get rich but at least you know you did it on your own merits and not by false means.

April 26, 2012

Why I Don't Follow Famous People On Social Media Sites

Famous people only want to be heard, they don’t follow you back and have no time to interact with us little folks.

Eventually, everything the big guys have to say and share will make it’s way to your feed via all the other people that follow these guys and you wind up with four or more of an update by Mr. Blank. You can fill in the line with whomever you feel is a guru, SEO expert, celebrity or media giant. I don’t know about you but multiple posts by anyone is overkill for me I don’t care how much I like them.

Their god worthy comments clog up your wall and then you don’t get to read the great things your real friends have to say. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy some of what they tell us and I even learn a little once in a while but it gets old really quick with me. I saw it the first time and all the other times there after.

Most social media sites have a friend limit and I’d rather add people who might add me back or whom I can have an actual conversation with. I realize some aren’t online as much. Some people are busy, have kids or work long hours at their jobs. I get that and don’t hold it against anyone if they aren’t able to be as active as others.

I don’t have anything personally against these people and some have great information to share with us but if it’s going to filter down the grape vine anyway why not just wait and hear it second or even third hand?

A few times I’ve gotten a reply from some of them with a condescending remark, which left me not liking them quite so much. If you disagree with them, have suggestions or aren’t interested in their new website they are promoting or product they are selling they can be quite ugly. They are so used to people worshiping the ground they walk on that if someone has an opinion of their own they don’t know how to deal with them.

I’m not mean or rude when I make a comment but sometimes I simply don’t agree. A woman on Google+ recently blocked my comments because I posted a remark about not liking cats. Seriously? I'm not losing sleep over it... but I did cross her off my friends list. If she's not going to let me post a comment I don't need to see her posts. 

Most people don't want our real opinion they just want mindless lemmings who tell them how great and wonderful they are. "Your posts are the best!"

I want the real deal, people. Don't gloss it over or tell me I'm super or the best. I'm okay with your opinion as long as you aren't being rude and crude for shock factor. You are entitled to your opinion and I'm not going to hold it against you. I don't like fake people. 

I don’t blindly follow a person just because they are rich or famous. Sorry to disappoint them but sometimes they are wrong. Nobody is right all of the time.

Fame and fortune doesn’t impress me, they put their pants on the same way the rest of us do and guess what? They have stinky bodily functions like everybody else too.

I’d rather help out a struggling new person than those making millions. They already have their large piece of the pie and a head too big to fit through doors.

If I ever get that famous (in my dreams) and act like an arrogant ass y’all be sure to let me know.

April 19, 2012

Art Is In The Eye Of The Beholder

One man’s fence post is another person’s work of art or so it appears.  

I enjoy visiting art museums and art festivals. Over the years I've been to many of them. Most I have seen is fascinating even if I don’t think it’s beautiful or understand it. Occasionally though, I’ll wonder why something is featured and exactly what makes that piece any more special than a common object in our world.

I’m not saying common things can’t be artistic but I like to think the artist put some effort into a piece especially if they are going to charge thousands of dollars.

I saw an exhibit by a great person who charges outlandish prices for simple things like a fence post that is painted blue.

I called my husband over, “Come look at this one.”

He looks at it with a puzzled look on his face. “It’s a fence post.”

“Yeah, that’s what I thought too. We have a gold mine in our backyard.”

I realize that simplicity can be a subject of beauty but I draw the line on some things.

Another piece is paint splattered onto a canvas. If I can do it… it’s not art.

I’m not an artist, at least not the kind that puts things in a museum. I write, which some consider art but if I wrote a single word in blue letters on my website and expected thousands of people to come look and if they wanted to own that particular font and want a copy of it then they must pay me $3500.00.

I would be quite bold to expect it and I couldn’t ask that price with a straight face. I’m not even sure how people come to think so highly of themselves that they are comfortable doing that.

At what point in your career do you decide that anything you make with your hands is very valuable no matter how miniscule or how little effort you put into it?

Perhaps J.K. Rowling or Stephen King could simply put an “X” on a sheet of paper and sell it for thousands. I joke but that is probably true especially if they signed it. Actually, their signature is what would be valuable more so than the “X”.

Maybe those artists created really wonderful things before the fence post and splattered paint pieces and I’m just not hoity toity enough to know about their past wonderful creations. Perhaps that is how they have come to this point in their career where they don’t need to make much of an effort to sell anything.

The flip side of that coin are the artists that put hours and days into a temporary piece like sidewalk chalk, snow or ice. It would be difficult for me to work so hard on a project knowing it will deteriorate in a short while. 

To me these creations are much more beautiful and worth a bigger price than the fence post and yet they are only here for a short while. We can enjoy them today and perhaps tomorrow but after the next rain or warm day they will be gone. 

April 13, 2012

My First Stalker

I’ve had a few over the years, mostly on line. It’s a bit creepy in a flattering weird sort of way. That was a mixed up sentence.

I was pretty young at the time and he wasn’t really my type, well almost. The brown eyes fit but the blond hair not so much. Nothing against blonds I just wasn’t into blond men even though I dated a few.

Just to give you a mental picture: back then I was tall (5’6”) and skinny, just like now only I had bleach blond long hair. My wardrobe of choice would fit inside a shoebox: short jean shorts, a tube top and Candies.

We’ll change my stalker’s name just in case he’s still out there somewhere looking for me. Surely not. For this story, we’ll call him Greg. 

Greg was a Scorpio; that probably doesn’t matter to most of you but at the time I was deep into astrology and would date or not date based on that information. I later broadened my horizons and didn’t worry so much about star signs but back then it was a big deal. For those of you who care, I’m a Gemini.

He and another guy that looked like the devil and had a foot fetish (that’s a tale for another time) are the only two Scorpios I remember dating and neither one lasted very long.

Greg was a few years older than me, not going to college, lived with his parents and didn’t have a real job. I say real job, he made money but we won’t go into the particulars of that occupation.

For those of you that remember John Denver, this guy was a spitting image of him as a young man. Same long blond hair and round wire frame glasses. Sadly, I was never a fan of John Denver’s music (I don’t like country music) nor did I think he was all that attractive being a blond headed fella and all.

So anyway, he meets me at some party, I think. It’s been a long time so the details of our first encounter are a bit fuzzy for a few reasons most of which I’d rather not go into. As I recall I had gone with another guy I was sort of having an affair with and when we arrive his fiancé was there, making the situation a bit awkward especially since I had no idea she existed. The feeling was mutual.

Rule number 1: make sure all men are unattached before you get into any sort of serious or even semi-serious relationship even if he is your assistant manager and the guy all the girls at work wants to go out with and he chose you over them. (Talk about a rambling sentence.)

So there I am with no date trying to avoid the guy I came with and his fiancé who is giving me the evil eye. I don’t know what she’s so upset about, she’s short and has big boobs which in my mind was the recipe for the perfect woman because I was neither of those things. She was a brunette but so was I underneath the peroxide.

Just to give you a mental picture, the guy I was dating was pretty tall and looked like a blond headed young Patrick Duffy. For you star sign buff, Patrick was a Leo, supposedly a good match.

For the record, after these two blond fellows I never dated another light-headed guy again. Maybe the stalking or cheating thing left a bad taste in my mouth or perhaps I realized they weren’t really my type but just thought I’d mention it.

No wait; there was another blond guy. Crap, I’m totally messing up this story. Meanwhile back at the farm.

So I go outside and sit on this big deck in the backyard looking at a flowering bush, I think it was azaleas. Most everyone else was paired up, making out or arguing as was the case with blond Patrick and his fiancé. I’m thinking I’ll call someone to come get me here in a bit but for now I’ll sit out here, drink a beer and ponder my predicament. So far it didn’t look like future Mrs. Patrick was going to try to kick my ass so things weren’t going too badly… yet.

Greg sits beside me and starts talking about bees, ants and beetles. Not sure how he got on that subject, why he thought it was a good conversation to have with a girl in my situation but there you go. It was a wonderful relief to talk to a guy who wasn’t obsessed with sports which back then was one of my first rules.

If you talked to me about sports you were out, no baseball pun intended. I dated a couple jocks and found them to be mostly lacking in the intelligence department. No offense to sports fans or those that played sports, I’ve since learned that some of you did in fact have some smarts but back then I didn’t meet any.

He did help get my mind off of worrying for my safety (I was a weenie and never fought anyone). Then we moved on from beetles to The Beatles and we discussed bands and taste in music. We got along pretty well, actually, even though I really wasn’t terribly interested in insects. By the way, I heard he later became an exterminator. lol

He ended up taking me home and then the stalking began. Actually, in the beginning I was dating him so he wasn’t technically stalking me but in hindsight I mostly dated him because he kept showing up. You know the saying, “half of life is showing up” well, he took that seriously.

One day he took me to his house, probably hoping to get lucky but he tells me he needs to change clothes. Okay.

We start kissing and I realize he has this weird split on the top of his tongue. It curves way down on top. He tells me that a girl he was dating bit his tongue when he was making love to her.

That did it. I would have been okay with the messed up tongue, I don’t expect people to be perfect but all I could think about was, “What the hell did he do to that poor girl that made her practically bite his tongue off?”

He takes me home and I start avoiding him or at least I tried to. I would come home from a date and he’d be at my house visiting with my mother. I told her not to let him in and stop encouraging him but she thought he was cute and I was being too hard on the guy. I never told her about the tongue story but I doubt it would have made her any difference.

This went on for several months; he would show up everywhere, when I went out, at my job, just watching me. He would lean against a wall with that far away look in his eyes staring. He would drive by my house. He even knocked on my bedroom window one night just to talk. A few times I woke up in the middle of the night with a creepy feeling someone was watching me. I was too scared to get up and look out the window.

He had even charmed my dog so he never barked to let me know he was in my backyard.

If I went into a 7Eleven and saw him playing a video game (he did this a lot) I’d turn around and leave, quickly.

I told him, “You are not my type you need to stop following me around.”

His reply was, “I just want to be your friend,” or “I was just checking on you.”

I finally moved out and he didn’t find out my address or he finally moved on, not sure which but it was a relief to not have to worry about him showing up all the time. For a long time after that I would look for him. If I saw a blond guy with glasses in a crowd I tensed up and got nervous.

Part of me felt guilty and sorry for him but he seemed to lack legal ambition (I was a bit worried about driving around with him and what was in his trunk).

And then there was that fear of the unknown.

April 10, 2012

Teachers Should Teach Children To Think For Themselves

There are some great teachers in this world that instill a thirst for learning in their students. Kids enjoy going to school and can tell their teacher is passionate about the curriculum and wants them to learn the material.

Unfortunately there are also a few arrogant teachers that want you to memorize what they give you and nothing outside that classroom is important.

Bad teachers do not want to be proven wrong. You do it their way and no other will work.

My second child is a free thinker like myself and doesn’t take anyone’s word for anything. He also doesn’t like it when someone gives him inaccurate information and expects him to believe it.

When he was in kindergarten his teacher passed out work sheets of marigold flowers and told them to color them yellow.

My son quietly colored his red, orange, yellow and variations of those colors. He’s always been very artistic and his coloring skills were above average for his age. I know, coloring isn’t part of the basic three R’s, but still.

She took his paper away and told him he didn’t follow directions properly, marigolds are yellow and he was supposed to color them only yellow.

He told her that marigolds are not just yellow, but also orange, red and some are even variegated. Nothing doing, she gave him an F or more than likely a U because in kindergarten you got Unsatisfactory for failed papers.

The next day he brought her flowers from our garden. At first she thought he was trying to butter her up for the bad grade but soon realized he was proving her wrong. Marigolds were not just yellow but all those other colors he mentioned. I think she would have been happier if he were trying to charm her with a bouquet. 

She wrote a note and pinned it to his shirt. When your child gets off the bus with a note attached to their shirt you know it’s usually not good news; so was the case this day.

Mrs. Cranky wanted a conference to discuss my son’s attitude and uncooperative behavior.

She begins to tell me how he argues with her during class and won’t sit quietly listening.

I can’t remember the other incidents but they were similar to the marigold situation and in those cases he was also right.

I said, “Marigolds aren’t only yellow. He was coloring them the way he sees them at home.”

“Yes, but I told him to color them yellow.”

“I understand but he assumed you didn’t know that marigolds come in many colors and he was trying to teach you.”

“I am the teacher. I am the only one that teaches in this class.”

I want to add that my son did not yell at the teacher, call names or in anyway become belligerent. He simply did what we do here at home all the time and that is communicating our views and opinions. My children were not raised to simply obey and not question. If my husband or I are wrong we admit it.

The problem with complaining to the principal about this particular teacher is that he was her husband so it did no good. It was common knowledge that she ran the school from the kindergarten classroom. In fact, she needed an aid so she could leave the room to attend any important meetings because she was the Hilary Clinton of the school if you know what I mean.

Too many schools want lemmings; they do not want children that think for themselves or question their teaching. You sit down; be quiet and listen. Those sleeping in the back are fine because they aren’t making any sound, aren’t defying the teacher’s claims or making them look inept. Having the appearance of inadequacy is a very bad thing to this type of teacher.

Bad teachers would prefer children that aren’t learning anything to ones who have an opinion.

Again, I want to add that not all teachers are like that. Over the years my kids have had some wonderful teachers. My daughter has a history teacher right now she loves.

She actually has two history teachers; one is a coach and isn’t really teaching. He spends all hour, or block in this case which is longer than an hour, talking to the guys about sports. Try reading a textbook and working on an assignment when a bunch of bulked up jocks are hooting and hollering about balls. Can you tell I hate sports? This is partly why.

Coaches should never be teachers. I have yet to see one that even wants to be a teacher. They got a degree in whatever subject they thought would be the easiest to get through so they could spend the rest of their lives playing ball, talking about sports and watching sports. That’s it. They really don’t care if your kids learn anything in their class but if your son is a ball player you can bet he’ll get a good grade because otherwise he can’t remain on the team and we all know sports is more important than academics at least in the southern states.

Teachers that really want to teach history, math, psychology or whatever, often have a hard time getting a job because some ball tosser was needed to coach their team. So our kids suffer, aren’t learning anything that hour, hour and a half because some moron warms a chair talking about sports instead of the history of our country.

I’ll step down off my soapbox now.

April 2, 2012

So Much To Do Where Do I Begin?

I am having one of those days. Where do I begin?

You can make a list and I have done that before. It saves me from getting sidetracked because when there are a lot of things to do I find myself wander cleaning, I'm sure you've done it too.

Going into the dining room I see a book that goes in the office, then in the office I write for a little bit and get sidetracked on FaceBook or some other social media site, then I go to the bathroom, then start cleaning the bathroom, taking the towels to the hamper I decide to vacuum the hall, then I pick up an earring back that belongs in my bedroom and I decide to straighten the nightstand.

Days like that I have worked all day but none of the rooms are completely clean because I've spent the day wandering from room to room, thats' what I call wander cleaning.

I bought two large shelves to go in my office/sewing room to hold some of my collection of books. That will take a few hours. I have no idea how many books I have but I know it's more than the average American.

Articles and ideas for writing were swimming through my head at wee hours this morning, I got cold so I got up at six. For those of you that work at a "real job" that probably doesn't sound that early but I normally don't get up until seven or seven thirty. There is no commute time so I can sleep longer. When your office is across the hall there are advantages.

Walking at the park has been crossed off my list so I have that out of the way but then there is laundry and a few other chores as well as writing.

There's an old saying, "A woman's work is never done." Some of you women's lib folks probably don't like that saying but I've seen my husband's cleaning and I'd rather do it myself even if he is willing, able and I work too. Some things just need a woman's touch, I don't care what y'all say.

Even when I worked outside the home I did most of the cleaning and laundry. We've had pink man panties and shrunk blouses---it wasn't pretty.

He does a lot around here so it's not like he's lazy. I don't mow, change the oil in our cars, clean the air filters or a few other chores so it evens out. I'm not into women's lib so I don't worry about the chores I do defining me. I am a woman, I do women's work. So what?

This is why my husband prefers me working from home because I can set my own schedule which does get hectic sometimes when I have multiple writing jobs lined up with a deadline. Blogging and HubPages isn't my only gig.

I also have time for cooking which I am much better at than he. We don't squabble over housework and everything gets done; that's all that matters.

Which brings me back to today where I have to clean, wash and organize. Chores aren't fun but a necessary part of life. Unless I pay someone else to pick up after everyone, I have to do it.

I guess I better get started instead of writing about it. :o)

March 24, 2012

A Cell Phone With Whipped Cream And A Cherry On Top

Yesterday we went shopping for new smart phones because everyone else has them and we certainly don’t want to be left out.

My current cell phone was just fine doing what it was supposed to do which is take calls but now days that isn’t enough, oh no, now they have to play music, videos and make us a sandwich.

The young man who looked like he was about fourteen showed me several different phones that did all sorts of things including talk to you. I guess if I get lonely I can strike up a conversation with my phone.

He talked to me about frozen yogurt, gingerbread and ice cream. Oddly enough I was hungry after leaving his store.

“So your cell phones have frozen yogurt, gingerbread or ice cream but you don’t sell any of those items for human consumption?”

“No ma’am.”

“Okay, well you are in China town can I at least get an egg roll?”

“We don’t sell those either.”

They really shouldn’t talk about all that food if they aren’t going to at least offer you a complimentary cookie, it’s the least they could do since they charge you a fortune for a small device that fits in your pocket.

Any day now my phone will update to the Ice Cream, I didn’t have the heart to tell him I’m lactose intolerant.

He gave me his business card in case I had any questions. I did. I bet he is wishing he never gave me that card.

I got a HTC Sensation phone and I told him that reminded me of INXS’s song New Sensation. He just looked at me with a blank look. He clamed to be a big music buff but never heard of INXS.

So as well as being hungry I had that song going through my head. In case you’ve been living under the same rock as my new friend Van here’s INXS.

March 20, 2012

Website Spammers

Once you’ve moved up in the world of blogging and have done your marketing properly you start getting all sorts of attention and sometimes you get emails and comments from spammers.

One of the things I love about Blogger is their great filter software that sorts them out. I get an email asking for approval before any suspicious comments are posted. My readers never see them but I get several every week.

What is spam?

Were not talking about the salty canned meat variety. This spam comes in the form of emails or comments usually soliciting a service you don’t want.

I say usually because one man’s spam is another man’s bread and butter.

Examples of spam

Recently I’ve gotten emails telling me my website was difficult to find but with their service I can increase my audience. I must not be too hard to find if they found me.

Others are prostitutes and don’t even bother to find out I’m a woman. The reason I suspect them to be ladies of the night is because their emails say they are looking for a nice man to get to know better. I realize some countries might not know that “Pamela” is a woman’s name but my picture is on my websites. Maybe they are hoping I have a lonely desperate male assistant.

Most of us have read the emails from Ethiopia telling us we’ve won or inherited a large sum of money and if we will give them our bank information they will gladly send it to us. Unfortunately people fall for this one on a regular basis.

I get emails asking me to be their pen pal. While many of these people are probably harmless, in this day and age one can’t be too careful so if I receive a short note in my webmail with little information about the sender, you aren’t going to get a response.

There are many other scams out there but these are the ones I’ve gotten lately.

Should you put your email on your website?

For a long time I didn’t post mine for just this reason and figured if anyone wanted to talk to me they could just post a comment on one of my blogs or articles but I have read in many marketing books as well as online articles that it is a good business practice to give your customers a way of reaching you.

I have gotten a few writing jobs this way so it is a good idea, you just have to be careful who you accept work from since many correspondences are spam. Not all writing offers are legitimate so be sure and check them out before taking the assignment.

Oh and I am not interested in buying Viagra or any other pharmaceuticals from strangers. Surely you don’t think I’m that gullible. 

March 13, 2012

Charlie Chaplin, Cell Phone Gold And A Frog

I’m doing research for an article and it’s amazing the weird crap I find sometimes when trying to write a serious story. By the way it's been hard to find a video to go with this particular article I'm working on. Usually, I have no problem at all and can find several videos but today I struggled to find one so this article may be without a video. But in the process I found many weird ones and decided to post them here for you to see. 

There is a video on YouTube and here since I’m going to share it with you showing a woman in a Charlie Chaplin movie looking like she is talking on a cell phone. There are people trying really hard to prove we have the ability to time travel and this video is one of them.

They slow it down and zoom in so you can see this woman who, I admit, does look like she's talking on a cell phone but common sense tells me otherwise. Maybe she's talking to herself and maybe she is holding her hat on or a hearing device on her ear. 

First of all, you have to have satellites and cell phone towers to talk on a cell phone and even if someone in the future figures out how to make phones that don’t need these why would she even have to hold it to her ear? It would be more like Star Trek’s watch phones or an earbud that just sits there hands free.

And we wouldn’t have some old lady traveling through time; they would send a young person. Why send Granny when you can send an able bodied youngster that doesn't have rheumatism because the lady in this film looks to be in her 80's. The trip alone could kill her. 

There are people arguing for hours about this video and possibility of a person traveling through time just to be in a Charlie Chaplin movie while chatting on a cell phone.

Then we have videos showing us how to take apart our old cell phones to get the gold out to turn in for money. Well, now we know why those darn cell phones cost so much, they're made of gold. Those Apple iPhones must have a lot of gold in them.

Most of y’all have probably seen the video game playing frog catching flies or whatever characters are on a cell phone game. It’s had a lot of views. People love to watch critters do funny or cute things.

Not to be outdone some guy posted his bearded dragon playing a video game. 

There are more animals doing funny things with cell phones if have a few minutes to spare and want to go over there and look. 

March 7, 2012

A Six Pack, Two Beers And A Pack Of Cigarettes

You know how sometimes you remember something and you aren’t really sure why it sticks in your mind… it just does?

A long time ago in a far away land, no wait… Anyway when I was a teenager I worked in a small grocery store near my house.

Every evening, without fail, this same man would come in red nosed buying the same thing, a six-pack of beer (I don’t recall the brand), two more beers and a pack of cigarettes.

He was a nice man, didn’t flirt like some of the older guys that came in, he just smiled, didn’t say much, bought his purchases and left.

The other cashiers and sackers would make comments about why eight beers? Was that what it took to get his buzz each evening? And why not buy a case or carton of cigarettes instead of stopping by the store each and every evening?

I’ve thought about that over the years and decided he was probably the type person that would drink however much he had and by only purchasing eight beers at a time he kept himself from drinking too much even though drinking eight beers every night isn’t at all healthy.

I should mention that here in Oklahoma we have liquor laws so this beer couldn’t be over 3.2 in liquor content to be sold in a grocery store.

Maybe it was the same thing with the cigarettes, if he only bought a pack he would stop at the end and if he had more he would smoke them.

I’m not sure how old he was, being a teenager anyone over the age of 25 looked about the same to me until they reached really old, you know, like 50. I’m guessing he was probably in his 30’s. I don’t know if he was married, I don’t remember a wedding ring but that doesn’t really tell much since not all married men wore rings back then. Heck, not all of them wear them now.

I’m assuming he had a wife since he never bought food, but then again it’s possible he bought his groceries somewhere else. Maybe he kept his food purchasing separate from his partying stash when he shopped.

And if he had a wife, what did she think about Mr. Eight Beers and a Pack? Was she okay with it? Did she overlook his addictions since he came home every night and kept a job? Not being a womanizer prowling around at night can be a plus in many women’s books. And then again maybe she was a nag and those beers were how he put up with her every evening.

I don’t expect he lived to be very old with that way of life but then I might be surprised, some people seem to have a cast iron liver while others don’t last very long on that diet.

By the way, he was my favorite customer.

March 1, 2012

Thirty Hubs In Thirty Days HubPages Contest

If y’all don’t see much of me on social media sites the next 30 days it’s because I took leave of my senses and decided to do a thirty-day challenge where I write an article everyday, hopefully legible, well written and interesting.

HubPages has these contests every now and then to get us motivated and give us a little extra money, which is always great to have so I thought I’d take the plunge. I have three birthdays next month so extra cash would be nice. I have to put up with three Aries men; can you believe that?

So I’ve been researching trying to come up with my 30 answers because, I forgot to tell you this part, we have to answer questions people have asked in the question and answer forum on HubPages. Some are pretty easy but some not so much. There are some that are in broken English and I’m not altogether sure what the poor souls are even trying to say but most are legible.

Having challenges is a good thing and helps get us motivated and focused. Having a goal will make me work harder and get more done. Not that I goof off and play otherwise but I can always do more. It’s amazing how much we can accomplish when we set our minds to it.

So I’ve found a video because you know I love them and I’m going to play it everyday to get me motivated. Yes, I know Van Halen isn’t singing about writing but it still works.  I’m an 80’s rocker girl and like me some longhaired rock n roll. I’m going to finish what I’ve started and keep with the plan. I think I can, I think I can, I know I can!

I’m picturing my guitar-playing cheerleaders in tight jeans and sexy smiles. Sorry, I got sidetracked. *cough*

You can help by reading my stories on HubPages. They’ll pop up in my HubPages box to the right over there. It's the one that says, "Hubs by Pamela N Red." 

Just click on the title and it will take you to HubPages land where you can see what I’ve been up to, read my stories and see that I’m keeping up with my goal. ~wink, wink~

It will certainly be a challenge since we have Spring Break this month and I’m going to be working on one of my rent houses but I’ve gotten a bit of a head start with research so at least I have an idea what I will write about. Should be a piece of cake… I hope. 

Now put down that guitar and come over here...

February 25, 2012

Is It News Or A Variety Show?

What has happened to the news these days? I don’t watch daytime television and haven’t for quite a while because most of it isn’t worth tuning into but now the news has gotten silly.

In the evening when I do turn on the television for the latest reports and weather we are bombarded with advertisements for the morning show where anchor people have turned into blooming idiots playing, “Rock, Paper, Scissors,” pretending to play musical instruments or having eating contests. “Can Jed eat that twenty pound steak?” Do people honestly enjoy that kind of stuff? I just want the news, people.

It’s bad enough that we’ve put actors out of work by hiring any Joe on the street thinking America gives a hoot about “Reality,” now we are trying to turn the news cast into street entertainers.

And what’s with the coffee? Everyone is drinking coffee and then someone comes in with a pot giving refills. Where are the tea drinkers? That’s what I want to know. I guess I couldn’t be an anchorperson since I don’t drink coffee.

Well my solution was to just not turn it on but some evening broadcasts are switching to this new kind of reporting as well. People no longer sit behind a counter, they now stand showing off their fashion clothes because drab conservative anchor duds were too boring. I can’t keep my attention on the map to find out if it’s going to rain because Susie’s glittery dress is distracting me.

And since when is an actors personal life breaking news? I can see letting us know when a famous person passes away but do we really care who is having an affair with whom or what celebrity is going into rehab for the umpteenth time? I don’t. They have separate entertainment shows for that.

It’s bad enough that most of them are slanted to their own personal political agenda. I’ve always thought they should paint a big elephant or donkey on the back wall to let new people know which side of the fence they stand on. Just tell me up front what you believe so I can make my decision because you aren’t going to change my mind based on your opinions.

Personally, I’d just as soon read the paper to get my news but the weather changes so much here in Oklahoma you have to keep a close watch on it sometimes and we only have one local paper which is also very slanted in their beliefs.

My favorite used to be PBS but they recently fired everyone and hired all new people for no apparent reason other than the fact they were old. I got a kick out of the weatherman because he always sounded drunk. I’m pretty sure he wasn’t but his voice had that tone that was fun to listen to. “Hurry, Hon, the drunk guy is telling the weather.”

I still watch PBS because at least we don’t have all the hoopla distracting me from the real reason I’ve turned on my television.

Yes, I know you can get news from the Internet too but I haven’t quite gotten into that. I do check out the web for world news but so far our local online news isn’t very user friendly. I can spend a lot of time trying to find a story about recent events. They purposely don’t update them right away because they want you to watch them on T.V.

I don’t have a problem with change when it’s for the better, but personally, I don’t think making news shows a three ring circus an improvement.

February 16, 2012

How To Be Popular On Facebook

Do you ever wonder why some people get all kinds of responses and comments and you can’t get anyone to even “like” your update? I’ll let you in on a few tips of why some people aren’t getting noticed on social networking sites.

Don’t take this personally if you fit one or more of these descriptions. We’ve all been one of these on occasion, you just want to make sure you aren’t that way all of the time.  

People are drawn to happy, fun, upbeat people so if you want to be popular on Facebook or any other social networking site avoid the following behavior. 

The Whiner

We all have bad days when everything seems to happen wrong but these people must have been born on Wednesday because their life is full of woe. They always need someone to pray for them, their relationship is always on the verge of breaking up, their boss hates them, they’ve lost/losing their job or they don’t have enough money.

Nobody likes a wet blanket. For Pete’s sake, surely something good has happened in your life this week, tell your friends a nice story once in a while and back off of the gloom and doom all of the time.

The Ranter

These people need a chill pill; they are always pissed off at someone or everyone. I imagine they are the people on the highway with road rage. If everyone would just straighten up and do as they say the world would be a much better place.

Go down to your local pharmacy and have your blood pressure checked, seriously.

The Politician

They aren’t running for office themselves although from their updates I’m sure they feel they could fix all of the nations problems if they could just get in the White House.

Every update is their political views about who should be in office or impeached.

Some of these are funny and I do learn things I wouldn’t always get from the news on television but this is information overload.

Take it down a notch; switch it up a bit with puppy bulletins or funny cartoons. We like variety.

The Activist

From animal rights to occupy Wall Street these people all have a stand on some issue and they make sure we all see the latest bulletin, horrible video of abuse or news story.

I’d love to save the baby seals but please don’t show any more pictures of them being beaten with clubs; some of us are eating lunch.

February 12, 2012

The Real Meaning Of Somebody And We

Around my house we use code words that have underlying meaning. Unless you live here and learn the lingo you might not pick up on these subtle nuances so I’m going to enlighten you.

We don’t want to sound accusatory or like we are making demands so we use this way of speaking to offhandedly make suggestions or let the other one know what we feel needs to be done. No finger pointing is done, no direct complaints (in most cases) and no orders are given.  

Most of the time it works out fine unless one of us is in a cranky mood and then all the subtlety in the world won’t work.


If I say, “‘Somebody’ left the bread unopened on the counter” or “‘Somebody’ wadded up the dishrag instead of spreading it out so it can dry,” it usually means my husband.

I don’t want to point any fingers and blame anyone but want him to notice his transgressions. I don’t say, “I’m not your mother or maid,” because truth be known I kind of am.

It won’t change anything, the bread will be left to dry another day and the dish cloth left to sour but it makes me feel better letting him know I saw that and would appreciate it if he doesn’t do it again.

If he’s in a bad mood he’ll say, “I know ‘Somebody’ is me.”

Then to smooth over the edges I’ll say, “Of course you are ‘Somebody,” Darlin.”


“We” is me.

If my husband says, “‘We’ need to get some more cookies” or “‘We’ need to deposit this check,” he’s talking about me doing these things.

Also if he says, “I thought “we” were going to take care of that?” This also means me. It’s his way of letting me know, “I told you to do that, why didn’t you take care of it?”

After years of marriage people get a little weird.

You Know Who

Our dog is deaf now but he’s really smart and when he could still hear we would often say, “I’ll give the rest of my pizza to You Know Who.”

Trouble is Basil is so smart he eventually figured out that when we said You Know Who we were talking about him so he would get excited when we said we were going to give him some food.  You would think after the dog learned his code title we would stop but no.

Sometimes he’s still referred to as You Know Who even though he is deaf as a post and hasn’t a clue what we are saying much less who the conversation is about.


I’m thinking about having shirts printed with We and Somebody on the fronts that way when people come over there won’t be any confusion as to who we are talking about when speaking in code.  

I guess I should have a shirt made for the dog too. 

February 8, 2012

My Husband Loses Things

They say opposites attract and it’s a good thing because if my husband married a woman like himself they would spend eternity playing hide and go seek. He can lose things better than anyone I know. If there was an occupation for people who could hide things he would be a huge success in that field.

Instead, he's a budget analyst, he can't find his house shoes but can find an error on a spreadsheet.

He spends half his life looking for things he’s lost. Fussing, cussing and discussing where he could possibly have left his “fill in the blank.”

Car keys, driver’s license, birth certificate, passport, keys to rental properties, computer cable, brief case, television remotes, DVD remotes and running shoes are some of the things he’s lost in recent months. As you can see he makes sure it’s important things that get misplaced.

He thinks I’m a smart aleck because I almost never lose my possessions and also am very good at helping him find his. Not that I’d make a good private investigator but I am pretty good at locating missing items.

Sometimes I’m busy and think to myself, “I’m going to let him find his own things this time, I have more important things to do than run around finding a grown man’s stuff.” It never fails, I am soon caught up in the hunt feeling sorry for him especially if he has to be somewhere soon and the item at large is a key element, in fact it probably is a key and he won’t get very far without it.

I’ve tried to tell him, “You need to tell yourself where you put things. When you lay your wallet down look at it and make a mental note, ‘I’ve put my wallet on the clothes dryer’ and then ask yourself, ‘why am I putting my wallet on the clothes dryer? Because you know that isn’t where it belongs.”

“I know I know I should pay more attention but I forget.”

It sometimes works for a little while especially after losing something important but then a few days or weeks later he’ll be running around like a chicken with his head cut off trying to find something else.

We’ve had people bring his wallet to him (they found it on the side of the road, we think he left it on the roof of his car) with all the money still inside. Yeah, he’s lucky. I teased him and asked if he threw his wallet out the window while driving down the road. He didn’t think that was funny.

He has lost cell phones, people will bring him his wallet complete with credit cards and large sums of money intact but keep his phone. Go figure.

People who lose things on a regular basis are usually aggravated with people like me who almost never lose anything. If my stuff disappears it’s normally because someone else moved it.

It’s because he is preoccupied with too many other things and paying attention to where he put his cup isn’t at the top of the list of things on his mind. And quite possibly it’s also because he has a personal finder that will locate his stuff after he’s misplaced them.